you ain't gon' tie me down.

[via cette]

here i am, blogging when i'm supposed to be studying for daryl's final tomorrow morning. have i studied yet? maybe not. am i nervous? maybe alittle. do i care? we'll leave that to the judges to decide.

[i know, i know, it's backwards. but it's the thought that counts. and that's what she said?]

even though i'm a month [and more. it'll have to wait.] behind, i would just like to say that i bought my ticket going to roma ALL BY MYSELF. as in i'm going to rome, italy all by myself. big girl stuff here. and i'm so so excited! not because i'll be on my own the whole time, because i've really realized out here that i don't like being on my own. it just doesn't call to me, like my daddy would say about, say, pizookie. i'm just pumped to have a legitimate experience where i truly am going wherever and doing whatever i want, when i want. i guess the idea of it isn't much different than it is in paris or santa monica or provo, except rome will be 100% foreign to me. yes, they can speak english there. but it'll be up to me to keep myself alive. not that i'll probably be put in the situation where i could die [besides when i swim with sharks in a pool of fire], but really. that's what it comes down to. there won't be a sister that i'm living with nearby or a study abroad director/friends in reach by phone. and i think it's so exciting because it means that those places that once sounded so big and scary to me because everyone's speaking a different language and nobody is around to point the right way, aren't anymore. it's like the metro system. first looking at it, i thought "there is no way in heck that i'm going to be able to learn that. there's just no way!" because that thing had some crazy kinda colors all up in it. but now it's second nature. just like paris. 

i can do 'em now. i can do 'em all now. and i will. and i'm talking about those big and scary places. the countries. i'm done. off to "study" aka dream about what will be at the marvelous brunch i wish was happening instead of daryl's final.